Barenaked Crockpot

Ok, so a little background on this show. On impulse I had asked my mom if I could go to a show. I was just beginning to really, get into the band. Being the cool person my mom is, she said ok. Unfortunately, my friends were not so cool. No one could or wanted to come with me to the show. So, I turned to dear loving mother to help me out. She was more than happy to go, having a great affinity for Stunt. Off we went to our homeland, New Orleans. We drove around the town a little, and mom went on about the good ole days. We went and ate at this cool restaurant on the lake. The name escapes me, but the seafood was fantastic. After that we headed to the show.

We got there early and got out tickets. I was totally stoked, 2nd row seats. Woo hoo! It still hadn't hit me yet that I would being seeing Barenaked Ladies no less than ten feet from me. After spending my lunch money for the next month on merchandise, I got comfy in my seat. We struck up a nice conversation with the people next to us. They had already been to a couple of shows on that tour. They were awesomely nice. Chantal Kreviazuk came on. I didn't like her very much. Not that her music was bad, but I couldn't understand a single word the woman said. It seemed that not very many people were excited about her.

So once Chantal left, there was the excruciating wait for BNL. I don't think it finally hit me until Ed walked out of the Inflatable Head's mouth playing the beginning chords to Too Little Too Late. I'll never forget that moment. Steve and Ty trailed right behind, and I looked at my mom with the biggest grin on my face ever. After that, I knew there was no turning back.

And here are some highlights. Many of those you-had-to-be-there moments:

**They did this scam improv. Ed was talking about fine tuning one scam he had. "'Hey mister! I bet you five bucks I can tell you where you bought those shoes'so far I'm $650 in the hole." Then, Ed asks a guy in the audience, "Hey Mister! I bet you five bucks I can tell you where you bought those shoes." He makes the guy stick them on the railing so everyone can see. "Nike store in Denver, Colorado." The guy said no. Ed: "Shhhiiiitttt!" So then Steve starts a song about people who have a five, wave in the air like you just don't care, wave in the air and give it to the guy. The camera guy ended up giving the shoe guy a five. Then Steve goes on to say that Ed has to have a proof of purchase from the place he guessed, because Ed doesn't want take five bucks if the person didn't really buy it there.

**During Tyler's "This is not a drum solo" the guys left the stage as Tyler was telling everyone to stay. Then, on the big screens they show the guys backstage looking bored in robes. Steve is sitting there smoking a cigar.

**Steve had this big wet stain on the front of his shirt that was from sweat. Steve goes, "It's not sweat, really. I just pissed my shirt." Ed looks at him funny. "How could someone piss themselves there?" And Steve is like, "I guess you have to have your cock in your shirt or something." Ed, has this wet stain on his shirt too, so he Steve goes, "Look you pissed your shirt too." Tyler chimes in with something along the lines of, "pretty soon I'll shirt my piss" or "shirt my pants" (not quite sure). Then Jim pipes in with "Look, I pissed my bass."

**Ed starts talking about his pants and how they are the most uncomfortable ever. To demonstrate Steve shows how there are two layers. On the backside of the first one it's rubber, then the second layer is mesh. Steve starts singing about his pants. The first part he went on about keeping his pants on. And Ed was like "yea, we don't want to see anything." Steve said there was nothing to see because his cock was in his shirt. The second part he sang about keeping bees in his pants because of the mesh part. Then he went on to sing about it raining in his pants because of the rubber.

**During Baby Seat, they showed the first and second rows on the screens. After the song Steve picks out this one guy (who was almost right in front of me) and says, "Hey you were the only one in the front two rows not singing. You need to get off of your ass and go buy Maroon. Go listen to it, then come back and sing." Ed said to go easy on the guy. He was probably too busy looking at the piss stain on his shirt. So Steve said the guy could redeem himself if he sang the Ed parts to the next song. He said they were easy. Then they start playing One Week. Steve was like, "You're not singing dude!"

**Ed was explaining how the show was sold out because they have such a great following in the south. He said the reason there were seats empty in the back rows was because some seats needed to be repaired and he was glad this many people were able to come to the concert due to limited seating.

*******Holy shit! They played Careless Whisper! That was friggin' awesome. I swear, I had that song stuck in my head a week after the show.

**During Careless Whisper, Chantal came back up. She gave Ed 100 dollars because he said she owed him from Vegas. Steve pointed out he owed the camera guy five. So Ed gave him Fifty and said he charges interest so by the end of the night the camera guy will owe Ed $47.50.

Ok, so after the show, mom and I decided to try our luck and see if we could meet the guys. So we roamed around a bit. We found the busses on the other side of this fence. So we hung out by the fence with a bunch of other people. We sat for a while ( I can't remember how long). There were these two guys being extremely obnoxious. They kept screaming for BNL to come out, that they owe it to these two guys. I still don't understand why people think they have to come out after shows, but I digress.Security came and brought us on the other side of the fence and lined us up against a wall.

There we waited a little while longer until Ed emerged. Throughout the show, I could have sworn Ed smiled at me numerous times. But I brushed it off as wishful thinking. After the show, when he came to us, he said "You two were in the second row, I remember you." I thought that was uberly cool that he remembered us. It was probably my horrid dance moves. He then asked me about the show and I told him I could die happy. That made him laugh. Ed was really cool. He was very nice and very genuine. I was getting a postcard signed for my little sister's birthday and I was telling him how much she liked them. He got a kick out of it.

Next out was Steve. He was really nice when we met. Too bad all I could get out was a quivering "Hi," Ahhh! There was so much I wanted to tell him. I really wanted to tell him how much the music really means to me. Too bad I turned into a major tool. Oh well, always next time right?

Tyler came out next. He was very funny. He had a drink in his hand, and my mom said, "Whatcha got there?" He said "a little juice, a little of that, a little vodka." So my mom asks if he brought enough for everyone (she cracks me up). He said, "No, I didn't, cuz I'm a selfish bastard!!!!" My mom was like "mmhmm I've got your number now bum." It was too funny. Then he asked her if she wanted to be in the pic, she said no. He said "huh, I was sidetracked by your shirt, getting me excited there." (She has this weird wrench of the week shirt).

Jim came out after that. He had to hunch down and I had to get on my tiptoes for the picture, so we were both laughing when mom took the pic. He said my Call & Answer trade ad was neat, he'd never seen that before.

Kevin came out last and he was very nice. We talked about Call & Answer for a minute or two. I told him how it was my favorite and how much I loved his piano in it. He said it was one of his favorites as well and he was glad I liked it.

Everyone seemed to like my trade ad. They all thought it was very original and nice. So, all in all, that night was awesome. I didn't think things could get any better. We drove straight home after the show, a five-hour trip. Guess who decided to fall asleep driving while only 10 minutes from home? Ironic, don't ya think?